Once, I used to envy all those girls and boys who weren’t the least bit nervous to speak their minds. Today, I’m proud to be one of those who cannot be easily faltered from what she believes is right.
I used to be a quiet child- was not very naughty, didn’t throw any tantrums and listened to what elders said. This transformed into a not-so-favourable demeanour in school. I was part of a group, alright but merely another player for group games. I followed them like sheep. I never realized I had a voice. I could only gape at all those “cool” and “popular” kids.
There was a rumour that I was a karate kid so all the boys would be like “don’t talk to her, she’ll give you a karate chop”. But on one hand, that rumour saved me too else I’m pretty sure I would have been bullied…. I was a mere pushover for the girls anyway.
But just before high school, my character somehow became repulsive. I was in a spiral of pessimism. I was never satisfied and always irritated. I often used to shout at my parents. My politeness with my friends went away and was replaced by jealousy. I prayed each day to die. I know….quite crazy.
But just 2 years later, I made a big breakthrough. I had my first guy best friends, I started reading novels, helped my friends with lessons, shared more and I realized….that making others happy, made me happy! Suddenly, my empathy increased tenfold, I developed a very open mind and I realized how foolish my thinking used to be.
As my confidence in myself increased, I found my voice too.
There never seems a day when I get bored. Something or the other occupies me (which includes laziness too). I now have a vision, my own beliefs of what’s wrong and what’s right and also the courage to speak my mind.
I may not be a social bee (and who cares?) but I definitely am a proud person who is not afraid to make mistakes and who is determined to accomplish what she believes in.
Come to think of it, isn’t that what matters in life?